Currently Watching Babel By Brad Pitt, Cate Blanchett, Mohamed Akhzam, Peter Wight, Harriet Walter see related

Yes, I'm actually posting a blog.  Your eyes are NOT deceiving you.  It's been 4 freakin' months!  oops! 

The reason I'm actually posting is because I once again have a matter of prayer.  We found out Friday afternoon that my dad has prostate cancer.  On top of the fact that he needs a kidney transplant and he got a pacemaker less than a year ago.  It's been a bit much to take in.  I moved to CO the end of September and all this took place after I moved.  It's hard not to read more into it.  It's hard not to move back to MI at the drop of a hat.  It was hard to call work Friday night - a mere half hour after getting the news - and give them a heads up of where my head was going to be.  They graciously gave me the night off.  I don't think I was even in a state to drive to work.  I'm frustrated and angry and asking God WHY?!?!  Why does it have to be my dad?  I just don't get it!  And why does it have to be when I am so far away and all I want is to be a physical presence and source of strength for him.  It's just...I don't know...I don't know.

But then I try to remember what God has done in my life in the past year and what He continues to do and how He's using me in my parent's lives.  And it all kind of fades.  It doesn't take away the why's.  But it's a small glimmer of hope...which is what I really need right now. 

My parent's are meeting with the urologist on Tuesday night - after hours.  I don't know many doctors that have appointments after hours.  The dr. will be able to outline more of a game plan after that.  It's out of our hands.  And as my dad so poignantly said, "My name's Jud, not Job!"  Amen, Dad.  Amen.